2.6.07

My churches adventures in Izmir :)

Churches in Izmir

"I need to write this down before I forget how peaceful and happy I am today. I woke up early today determined to visit a church in Izmir. The passed days I noticed 2 churches near the hotel, one very close, and another on the main street behind the hotel. So, 8 o'clock in the morning I got up, and I was in the street heading for church at 8:30."

This is how I started writing about my church visits in Izmir, but I never finished it while I was in Izmir, so am finishing it now.

The first few, short visits to Izmir, I didn't look for a church in the neighborhood. But during the long stays, I started to search for one, and I found 3!

The first was the one beside the hotel, just 5 minutes away walking in the same street of the hotel. It was a 100 years old Italian Catholic church. The service was in Italian! and the priest looked a lot like the late Pope John Paul II

And for my surprise, I arrived at 8:30 and found the service is almost finishing! Ten minutes later it was the communion, and at exactly 8:45 it was over!

I looked around and had a look at the attendants: most of them were elderly people, of different nationalities, and in total there were round 20 people in the church. They didn't know each other, and as soon as the service was over, they quickly left the church. I went to one of the old ladies before she goes away, and asked her when does the service start, and she answered: 8:15! And I asked her again: 8:15? She said yes, with a suspicious look!

It mean I arrived at exactly the mid of the service J it was only 30 minutes long! And I remembered the average service in Egypt is not less than 2 hours by any means J

Then I went to the second church that I had noticed on the way back from work one day. I was like 15 minutes or less walking from the hotel. Since the first service I attended was only 15 min. so I decided to go and check the other one. And am so glad I did.

The second church was a 40 or 50 year old Evangelical church, called Saint John, it's American I think.

It was so beautiful! The service was in both English and Turkish. The hymns were so wonderful, reminded me of the Evangelical services I used to attend in my school long time ago. The priest was a Canadian one, it was this kind of missionary churches found everywhere. I enjoyed the service so much, and because it was in English I could really participate in praying.

Then after church, they did this gathering for breakfast that's found in most churches, and especially in USA where I've used to join such gatherings. So it was a good chance to get to know new people in Izmir, and there were lots of English tongues of course. The total attendants were over 40 person, varying from Turkish to Americans to Canadians to British, even an Iranian woman, who had "escaped" from Iran and married the British guy who I've come to know later. He was responsible for the prayer books and he always handed me the Turkish books first, then I'd ask for English ones insteadJ. Everyone there thought am Turkish by the way.

And on the first time I've been there, I got to know my dear Karen, an American old teacher who has been living in Izmir for 18 years now. She was round 70, and she looked so much younger. She came to Izmir years earlier, to work as a teacher in a school there, and after she retired, she found out that she fell in love with Izmir, and couldn't leave it and go back to USA.

"I have a life now in Izmir; I have my friends and service at church. I don't want to go back to USA now and leave all this", those were Karen's words to me. She was this kind of woman that sweeps you off your feet with her tremendous kindness and welcoming. She made friends with me so quickly and easily and started introducing me to everyone and the priest. Then she told me about the third church that I got to go in Izmir!

She told me that every Sunday after the Evangelical church service is over, and the little breakfast gathering is over, she goes to this Turkish church nearby, where she has a service: she did like a Sunday school for the Turkish young kids.

And she invited me to go with her.
Okay, to know the risk I took here, imagine with me:
It's the first time ever for me in this church, it's the first time I meet this lady, I do not know all the places in Izmir well, and I found out later that I had no money with me! (because I thought I will just finish church and go back to the hotel, so I didn't remember to take money)

And in spite of all this, here I am, riding the car with Karen and another Turkish lady with us, heading to this church. And am also glad I went J

We arrived to the church to discover it was just the basement and the first floor of a normal house, which was turned into a church, without an altar, without a perfect arrangement, but it was so full of love and God's presence.

First there were some spiritual songs in Turkish, with music and the wordings on the wall with a video projector, so I was able to follow. They were amazing! I couldn't believe how much I enjoyed the songs, even though I couldn't understand everything. But the words were clear, part Arabic part English, so I could get an idea of what the song said. To get an idea, the Holy Spirit was "Kutsal Ruh" J so it was clear, u know.

Then in the break, Karen told me how those Turkish people (over 50 – 60 person, the biggest number as u see) they took the Christian faith, and they started this church with donations, and they were facing lots of problems to oblige them to quit Christianity, and they gave them a hard time to give them a permission to build a church, that's why they are using this basement! (Sounds familiar to somewhere else, doesn't it?)

But the truth is, of all the 3 churches, this was the holiest, the most filled with God's presence, and the prayers were so real and heartily. Those people haven't been brought up in faith, so they appreciate it so much. They know they've been blessed and they carry this bless in their eyes and smiles. They welcomed me like they know me from years, because they knew am a Coptic Christian, and because they are so welcoming and loving. After the break they celebrated having a new member in their church: a young, cute little baby, the daughter of a couple in the church. Everyone was so happy with the newly born, and we all prayed for her & her family.

Then I had to leave, and Karen was to start her service, that's when I found out I had no money J and I do not know where we are, since we came by her car. But because I had enjoyed the morning so much, and I've prayed in 3 different churches and took their bless, I knew certainly I don't have to worry about how I'll go home. Luckily I had my mobile, so I just called one of my colleagues in the hotel, told him to wait for me at the hotel door with money, because I'll be coming in a taxi and I don't have any money... and he did. (Did anyone get worried about how I went back? :) )

For the next few weeks, I used to go to the first 2 churches, I skipped the Turkish one because of the distance, but I'll never forget that day when I went to all 3, and I've experienced things and met people that I'll never forget in my whole life..

Note: in Izmir there was also a very famous historical church called the "Ploycarpa", but I didn't have the chance to visit it. Maybe next time :)

And for those who don't know, Izmir is the city in the bible called "Smirna", one of the 7 churches in the Revelation book.

Are you strong?

Well, you must have thought about it before, haven't you? Where is your strength? How do you call yourself strong?

First put your parameters of strength. Yes it can differ from one person to another. Your idea and parameter of strength is purely your own. You might think that your strength comes from what you own, from your ability to accomplish, your physical abilities, psychological traits, faith…etc.
We can never list here all the things that make us (or make us think we are) strong. So you must define your own terms of strength.

You can also bear an instantaneous strength or long term strength. Both are needed and both are kinds of strength. You could be under preparation all your life to be strong in a one moment that needs strength of a lifetime. And also you could be working all your lifetime with the same strength that is needed for your normal everyday life. Actually both kinds help each other. What preparation could be better than going through small, short & hard situations and learning bit by bit how to be really strong? And when the big moment comes you already have a good supply of patiently built up strength.

Why do we need to be strong? I leave this question to you my dear reader, and while thinking it over, remember the last time you couldn't sleep at night…

Back again

My very dear Corner,

I'm back again.

I cannot explain the serenity I feel now coming back to you. The happiness and peace that crawl to me when I sit writing, knowing my words are addressed to you.

I missed you. I really did. I know I left you alone for a long time, but I was longing to have our special moment back together again. But being too busy to do any thing besides work, made me leave you all this time without anything new.

So now, after things began to calm down – hopefully – the first thing I thought of is coming back to you, telling you how I spent the past few months.

First you must know that I went through a lot lately. Many major events, good and bad, happy and worrying, I experienced all sorts of feelings and conditions.

But the biggest and most important was the 1 year project I've just finished.

There are 3 dates I cannot forget in this year:

Wednesday, May 31st 2006, when I first heard of it all in the interview: the traveling, the new position, and I still remember the innocent excitement I felt about the whole idea, not knowing still what lies under.

Thursday, February 15th 2007, at exactly 5:30 pm: there is no title for this event, but for me it was the night of Success. It was the first time to feel successful and triumphant after long months of hard work and traveling. It was the night I was congratulated. I never needed congratulations as I did that night, and oh I did get it. Can't tell you how strong I went home that night. Yes you know how hard and honest you worked, but still the words of appraise makes a difference.

Tuesday, April 10th 2007, our day came to reality. The date that has been a dream to all of us, became "Today". It was our Go-Live day. The time when you see the dreams and drawings come true. Not that everything was magically working, but that we were able to reach that point. Problems will never disappear, but knowing you can do it, makes you even more accomplishing. It's a day by day effort, step by step success. It will always be one of the landmarks in my career.

Dear Corner, I learnt a lot in this time. On all levels: professional, personal and human relations levels.
I learnt that no effort goes in vain. And no laziness brings you anywhere.
I learnt that how low people might go; never let them drag you down with them.

I learnt to make this total separation between work and life. The moment you step out of the office (if you ever do!) just forget work and forget the fights you had with your work mates, just go and enjoy dinner with them.

I learnt that it's most important to have your own identity in whatever you do. Put your mark, never be shy to make it clear and say it out loud. Life went into the direction of those who led it to, not those who just went with the stream.

I learnt that no matter how much you dislike a person, spending long times with him and experiencing all kinds of situations together, will definitely bring you closer and you'll begin to like him. A connection starts to grow between you which will go stronger everyday and will make you forget why you disliked him.

This project exhausted me physically, emotionally and intellectually, but in the end I feel it was worth it. I learnt a lot, got some experience that normally I will never get in just one year…

So I'm trying to settle down again, make a new routine for my life now. And what will never change is the time I spend writing on your walls, my dear corner.

27.1.07

Difference..

If you are eating so quickly, looking into your wrist watch every 2 minutes, drinking your coffee while it's still hot and making it cooler by adding cold water, to run afterwards quickly down the stairs to catch your ride: this is a business breakfast.

If you are dinning in a fancy restaurant, with an exquisite menu, paying to much attention to the choices more than you pay to your companions, then finishing your meal thinking about sleeping early to wake up early: this is a business dinner.

If you are shopping for everything because you are staying in a hotel, and looking for a teethbrush because you forgot yours at home: this is business shopping.

But, if you are sitting relaxed with your firends, enjoying the dinner and the conversation, trying to eat Sushi for the first time and laughing about it, talking about personal matters freely, hating the quick passing of time because you don't want to leave, feeling so happy and knowing that you will remember this moment forever: this is a real dinner with real friends ;)

Thank you Mine & Hussein ;)

1.1.07

Happy new year ;)

I sat at my computer determined to write something on the first day of 2007, with no idea on my mind, no specific message to send. Still I need to write, so I'll write down what ever comes across my mind.

During those days of Christmas & the new year, so many things happen, and events take place. Rush at work to finish things before the end of year, parties, the shivering cold weather of December, fears and hopes for the new year.

I just want to say: I have hope. I still have hope for the better to come. I still see it white, with pink stripes. I still have time to do things that will make me remembered, after I'm gone away from this life.

Still have time to accept me more. But no time to repent. No time to spend backwards, tearing myself with things that can never come along again to fix. Mistakes are there to be done, and to learn from.

And the lesson of the year would be: no body can see what you see with your eyes. If you see it like this, don't ask people to understand it the way you do. It's your life, and no one can set the rules for you how to live it. Enjoy it, don't ruin it by trying to follow their rules. In the end it's yours to take control of.

Limits for what's right & wrong is deep inside you, not in their words. If it were to be one rule to fit us all, we'd better all have the same eye color. Sometimes it's easier to follow rules, so as to have something to blame when we lose. Too difficult to look to yourself in the mirror, and tell it in the eyes: "You did a mistake".

And again we say it, till the deaf hear it, and the blind see it, be honest, follow your heart, for it will never fail you. Once your compass is adjusted, follow it with no worry.

Happy new year, new start, new hopes.
Stay well, be happy :)

28.12.06

Babel

During my stay in Izmir, one of the easy and fun outings for me is the cinema. Very close to my hotel, the movies are in English (no doublage) and all the latest movies are showing.

This time i saw 3 movies: The Guardian - Kevin Costner, Casino Royal - the new blond James Bond: Daniel Craig , and finally Babel.

First we thought it's a Brad Pitt's movie, but it turned out he was just one of many actors who starred in this movie. Babel is what u can really call: international movie.

It's been fun watching this movie, not that it is a "fun" movie, on the contrary it is a gloomy & depressing movie. But the idea is new, the locations are so variant, and the different stories from all around the world, come together so neatly and impressively.

For those who didn't watch it, i will not ruin it for u, for it is a movie to see, not to hear its story.
What was most touching about Babel, is how deep it went into human nature. The characters were not well dressed, no make up, no glamour, just plain faces, real expressions, and real-life situations. The dialogue in the movie was so little. Many scenes had no dialogue at all. It was left to the actors expressions to tell you the story. The story goes so deep into the human race, and explores its very basic needs and fears, that near the end, u discover that people from Morroco, Japan, USA and Spain are all the same in the end; they are human. The human nature doesn't change whether it lives a rough or luxurious living, a life full of technology or a very crude life where they look at any machine as someting from outer space. Man or woman, child or adult, the needs are the same: to love & be loved, to feel secure, to have peace ...

The word "Babel" doesn't come in vain. It reminds us of the Tower of Babel bible story, in Genesis chapter 11, (english) when all people agreed on building a very high tower in the old city of Babel, just after the flood was over in Noah's age. And because God promised them that He will never bring a flood again, he was disappointed by the people's reaction and building that tower, not trusting his promise. So to stop their plans to build the tower, he babled their tongues: every group of people spoke a different language. They couldn't communicate, the cooperation was so difficult to build the tower. They began having misunderstandings, they began to fight together, and they started to suspect one another.

That's how people began being different, but only in tongue, and communication habits. Yet they stayed the same, same human nature.

The movie shows how this babling still affects our lives harshly. Though being the same, though being the same human that we are, we cannot reach out to any one unless we have a common tongue. Not just by language, but language is just one way of communication, but also in the ways we affect & get affected by each other. We do not touch others in the way they'd like to be touched. We might be loving our loved ones in a way the cannot understand or need. Babling can ruin any communication and cause problems. And still they funny fact is: we are the same.

The movie goes on to show in its gloomy mood, how this babling is making us drift apart form each other, a husband abandons his wife afetr their son's death because they couldn't mourn him in a common language. A spanish woman gets accused of kidnapping the 2 kids she adores and escaping with them, because she wasn't understood, and her simple wishes were not undestood.
A mute girl brings herself to trouble because she is not understood by her own father.

Heart breaking scenes, to make us realize how we tear ourselves and others by not communicating. And to make it sharp clear, the movie takes place in 4 different countries, 5 languages, and so many characters. All characters interact, with no intention to cause pain to others, and still they do.

Finally you go out of the movie theatre, with wet eyes, depressed mind, with anger inside you against all the mischievments inside the movie, but please do not miss the important message here: hang on to your loved ones, speak to them , reach out to them and communicate with them in the language they can understand and respond to. Don't make pre-judgements. Don't neglect others when you don't understand them. They have important things to say. Hear them. You can even prevent problems from happening if you give them some attention.

Babel is a must see movie. Pull all your senses together and go watch it, don't forget to grab a packet of handkerchief with you ;)


27.12.06

Happy New Year


My greatest achievment up till now, is that i can still smile childishly when someone gives me a rose..

11.11.06

Words

What are words? Sounds we say to tell things. Are they just sounds? No. they are not just sounds. Before you speak, first you have to say something, an idea I mean, and you want to express the idea in words. It is maybe because you want something, or ask something, or want to give information about something. What makes you want to do this? It is a feeling or urge you have. So, if you do not have that feeling, you will not have an idea, and will not think of conveying this idea. SO, you will not speak. Yes. That's the bottom of it, if you don't feel, you will not speak. Words are feelings. Words are our channel to let out of our emotions and feelings. A word is not just a sound, it is emotional energy. Every word is a project. You first have an idea, then think of realizing it, then start making it real and finally say it. So the quiet people don't have feelings? No I don't think so. They are usually more sensitive than others. The thing is their feelings are much stronger than others, so turning them into words is usually hard, and might be not understandable to others. They work on a higher level of feelings. As always said, empty boxes produce higher noise when banged. Not every word you hear is correct or sincere. Not every word has been planned for and carrying an idea. And maybe the words left unsaid carry stronger ideas and feelings.

26.10.06

عشان بس محدش يقول ماحصلش

معنديش حاجة أقولها
ولا عايزة أناقش ليه ومين وازاى
أنا بس عايزة انشر الموضوع أكتر
عشان مفيش أى خبر فى أى وسيلة اعلام "وطنى" من بتوعنا
لأ حصل
وحصل كتير
سألت النهاردة ظابط شرطة نعرفه عائلياً عن الموضوع، قاللى مفيش أى حاجة حصلت
مقدرتش أسأله اذا كان بيكدب ولا فعلاً ميعرفش
لأ حصل
وحصل كتير
ومفيش طريقة غير البلوجز عشان نعرف بيها
اللى لسه ماقراش يقرا
أسهل مكان عند منال وعلاء
فى لينكس عندهم لكل اللى اتكتب
أقروووووا
وفى الآخر حد بس يقوللى: هل فعلاً أبويا عنده حق لما يقوللى متنزليش لوحدك بالليل
؟
أصل خلاص
مبقاش فى حد لأى حاجة ممكن تحصل
-------
واحد تانى أعرفه أبوه فى الشرطة برضو، مصمم انه دوا أخدوه كلهم مع بعض أو اتحطلهم فى أكل أو شرب
معنديش خلق عشان افند صعوبة حدوث ده
بس مش عارفة ليه حاسة ان كل ده مش غريب يحصل من غير دوا ولا زفت
المهم اقروا واحكموا
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كل عام وأنتم بخير

و ما يحلاش العيد طبعاً من غير شوية هيافة
بس المرة دى مش على روتانا، لكن على التلفزيون المصرى العريق
السنادى بقى قرروا ان لازم نخرج من القوالب الثابتة والفقرات النمطية فى العيد، بدون فقد خط الهيافة الأساسى و مع الاحتفاظ بمضمون الهبوط
وكانت المفاجأة، المفاجأة الكبرى
وبعد طول الانتظار
جابوا المادة الخام نفسها
جابوا "هايفة"... هو الفن العربى جاب إلا هايفة يا خواتى
يا روحى يا روحى يا روحى يا روحى
هايفة (أنا قاصدة أكتبها كدة) بشحمها ولحمها فى القناة الأولى
يا خواتى
الشعب المصرى المتقندل يتهيألى مالوش حجه بعد كدة عشان ينبسط
جابوله هايفه تانى يوم العيد
أوصف ايه بس ولا ايه
ابتدى بلبسه اللى كان عبارة عن حاجة كدة من فوق، ما بين قميص نوم وبيبى دول، فكرنى بمشهد من فيلم تايتانيك لما
الأم كانت عمالة تقطع فى نفس روز بالكورساج وتشد، وتشد عشان خصرها يبقى نحيل كدة ولا الغزال، وتقولها انها لازم تتجوز الجدع اللى مش طايقاه ده، اظاهر المشهد ده أثر قوى فى اللبيس بتاع الفنانة هايفه فقرر يلبسها زي روز، ونسى انه كان ملابس داخلية! ما علينا
وعلى الحاجة دى كانت لابسة بنطلون بيجامة أخوها الصغير وشاحطاه لغاية كتافها
يا خواتى عالشياكة
المذيع النحنوح والمذيعة المسهوكة ابتدوا يسألوا أسئلتهم الفتاكة بقى وهايفة بتجاوب كأنها بتدلى ببيان هام فى الأمم
المتحدة
شوية وسألوها عن المجوهرات اللى لبساها وهل من تصميمها ولا لأ (قال ايه عاملة كولكشن مجوهرات من تصميمها) فبدأت يا روحى تعرض علينا كل المجوهرات اللى لابساها حتة حتة وتقول ايه من تصميمها وايه هديه، وجت على الخاتم الألماظ الضخم وقالت انه هدية من واحد "عزيز" عليها قوى ولابساه مخصوص فى البرنامج عشان عيون الننوس
واحنا برضو نفرحلك يا حبيبتى يوم ماتلاقى ابن الحلال اللى يستاهلك
شوية وطلبوا منها تغنى اغنية للشحرورة! ناقصة هيا... المهم غنت بصوتها المغرد أغنية "عالبساطة"، وبعد كدة غلطت غلطة عمرها الفنى وغنت رائعة فيروز "بكتب اسمك" بصونها الحنين، وأشكر الظروف اللى خلتها تغنى مقطع واحد بس... الحمد لله رب العالمين
شوية كدة مركزتش فى الكلام، ولما رجعت أركز، لقيتهم بيقولوا ان أوبرا وينفرى مرشحة لجايزة نوبل للسلام (صحيح ده؟) عن جهودها ضد الايدز باين فى أفريقيا وكل الأنشطة الانسانية اللى بتعملها، وانها قال ايه اختارت هايفه عشان تقدمها فى الحفلة اللى تستلم فيها الجايزة
ستوب بقى
أوبرا وينفرى وعارفين انها فعلاً ليها أنشطة زى كدة وست آخر مجدعة
ايش جاب بقى هايفه للعمل الخيرى؟ دى حتى معملتش اعلان من بتوع مستشفى السرطان للأطفال، حد بس يقوللى ايه أنشطة الآنسة الخيرية؟

بصوا أنا اعتراضى على هايفه مش لسبب غير انها مختصرة نفسها فى كونها جسد جميل بس
هى فعلاً جميلة، جميلة وذكية، بس كمان كام سنة، الجمال ده حيروح، ومحدش حيتقبل دلعها ده

وبكدة بيقى العيد فرحة، وأجمل فرحة
والشعب المكبوت شاف حتة حلوة عالعيد، حتى لو طلع بعديها بهدل فى بنات الناس فى الشارع
كل عام وأنتم بخير

10.10.06

لما لا؟

الانسان، ذلك المخلوق الرائع
يذهلنا يومياً ويفاجئنا حينما نظن أنه لا مزيد من المفاجآت
عجيب، لا تجد اثنين متشابهين
دائم التغيير
لكن فى النهاية هو نتاج تأثير ما
دائماً يبحث عن منبع يستقى منه
يتأثر به ويؤثر فيه
ثم حسب طبيعته تظهر النتيجة
هناك من ينجرف بشدة فى اتجاه ما تأثر به، وهناك من يتعمد العناد والتغيير
نحتاج لهما هما الاثنين، نحتاجهما حتى تتوازن القوى
ولكن، ماذا يحدث لنفس الطبيعة اذا ما تعرضت لتأثيرين مختلفين فى أزمنة مختلفة؟
ترى هل ينتهى بهذه الشخصية المطاف لنفس المصير؟
أم يختلف تماماً، كأنهما فى حيوة مختلفة؟
هل هناك خطة أم هى تجارب؟ هل هى صدفة أن نحيا كما نحيا، أم هو مصير واحد مهما اختلفت طرقه؟
هل لو كنا نحيا حياة مختلفة، لكنا أصبحنا بشراً آخرين سوانا؟
لما لا
لكن كيف لنا أن نعرف، حين أنها حياة واحدة لنا فيها فرصة؟
كيف لنا أن نثق بما عقلنا وفهمنا وأقتنعنا به؟ كيف لنا أن نقف على ربوة وننادى بما نصدق؟
هل هو طريق؟ أم متاهة طرق ألقينا فى أحد فروعها مصادفة؟
لما لا
لكن فى النهاية نرى طريق واحد، ذو عدة طرق فرعية
لا نعلم كثيراً عن المتاهة
نخشاها فى حين أننا لا نعرفها
ولكن هناك من سيظل تراوده أحلام الخروج اليها
ولما لا
ولكن المتاهة قاسية
أعلم ذلك
أخشى حتى ان أسترق نظرة الى الممرات المتشابكة
أخشى ان أتوه فيها، فلا أستطيع العودة لطريقى
يا لهذا الانسان العجيب، يريد المعرفة والأمان... وكل شئ
هل يستطيع؟
لما لا

8.10.06

Breaking news: Dr. Sameh passed away today

Today, we lost a special person from church, Dr. Sameh George.
Like all special people, he didn't last long on our mortal earth.
He went to a better place, where he can enjoy the peace and love near God.
All what we need to think of and pray for, is his 2 young, wonderful special kids: Raef and Grace.
God meant for them a different life, to make them even more special.
May God protect and guide them, and give them peace.

I was thinking now: can the church tomorrow hold all the people whom Dr. Sameh has affected their lives? I doubt, it will be over full...

God rest his soul.

7.10.06

feel

.. and when i looked at you, you were laughing. You were among the crowd, maneuvering everyone and keeping the smile glowing. No one could suspect it, no one could say it and be believed, but i felt it. I felt it sharp and loud inside of me, that it shook me and made me stop at it. Inspite of all the crowd, of all the noise, of all the people...
..
you were lonely..
..

yes, i felt it deep inside me, and you never said a word. You never made a distant remark of it.. but through your eyes i could still see it, and in my heart feel it. What is going on in there, inside your mind, could never know. You do a good job in keeping it unseen. The only thing i saw was, your are alone among millions.

why do i feel the unspoken..? and see the hidden..?
maybe because i am like you..
and in the crowd, i saw only you, not the crowd..

3.10.06

كمان

علي بعد مليون ميل من أرضنا
من الفراغ الكوني بصيت أنا
لا شفت فرق بين جبال و بحور
و لا شفت فرق ما بين عذاب أو هنا
!!عجبي

لسه هو الملك


يا باب يا مقفول ... إمتي الدخول
صبرت ياما و اللي يصبر ينول
دقيت سنين ... و الرد يرجع لي : مين ؟
لو كنت عارف مين أنا كنت أقول
!!عجبي
*****
سهير ليالي و ياما لفيت و طفت
و ف ليله راجع في الضلام قمت شفت
الخوف ... كأنه كلب سد الطريق
و كنت عاوز أقتله .. بس خفت
!!عجبي
*****
عجبتني كلمة من كلام الورق
النور شرق من بين حروفها و برق
حبيت أشيلها ف قلبي .. قالت حرام
ده أنا كل قلب دخلت فيه اتحرق
!!عجبي
*****
ورا كل شباك ألف عين مفتوحين
و انا وانتي ماشيين يا غرامي الحزين
لو التصقنا نموت بضربة حجر
و لو افترقنا نموت متحسرين
!!عجبي
*****
انا كل يوم أسمع ........ فلان عذبوه
أسرح في بغداد و الجزاير واتوه
ما أعجبش م اللي يطيق بجسمه العذاب
و اعجب من اللي يطيق يعذب أخوه
!!عجبي
**********

Izmir, my love - 2 (pics)

My friend Dosst (the dog) which i got to know in the boat in Izmir. His owners who are in the picture, are so frindly and so kind. Dosst made my day when i was down that day, and i went home as happy as i would be after playing with Kooki :))

The ship that i used to ride from one side of Izmir to the other.

My hotel view @ sunset, great view. Never got bored of it!
---------------------------------------------
i just knew now that there was a bomb explosion in Izmir, in one of the cafes! i don't know where exactly in Izmir the explosion happened, but i really feel sad that humans are always ruining the beauty everywhere... as though more blood and destruction is what the world needs now...!

1.10.06

Izmir, my love - 1

Cairo airport, June 18th 2006:
"Now, i am sitting at the airport now, outside the gate that we will pass through. Gate 7.I can really admit that i do not like the traveling process: including the trip to airport, crossing gates and passing by officers, and then sitting alone, wishing the flight takes off soon. I always thought that the idea of traveling is good, but when i actually come to apply it, i do find it that appealing. I remember now all the times i traveled before and i come to realize "i'm not the traveling type!" Anyway, here i am waiting for the flight, & for my colleagues to arrive. I'm wondering: how this trip will affect my relationship with them? Will we bond more and become life long friends, or are we just going t spend some days together and that's it?Let's wait & see."
I wrote this in the airport on the first trip, it was 3:00am and i was really aprehensive to what will come up.
---------------------
Izmir, July 2006:
Izmir. the typical Mediterranean city, with the sea view and the big ships going back and forth its coast, where i spent many wonderful days.Izmir reminds me so much of Alexandria, mainly because of the atmosphere that you find in the Kordon area, very similar to Alexandria Corniche. Lots of cafes and restaurants along side the Kordon. People selling grilled corn and teen shoky to the couples sitting in peace. Beggers even look like Egyptian ones. Kids playing in the garden near the Kordon while their mothers are sitting gossiping. Amateur fishermen trying to catch a few fish from the polluted sea, but enjoying the fishing more than the fish itself. Yes Izmir is so live and joyful. You can sit in any cafe or restaurant and find the service very welcoming. All kinds of food and deserts are found there. If you prefer brands names you can also find International and famous restaurants.
---------------------
Window shopping is as fun as in Egypt. But for night dresses and wedding gowns it was always on the 1st floor of buildings and not in the street level. I was always wondering how to get there, but never had the chance to visit one of those atheliers.
---------------------
As i walk in the Kordon, heading for the boat station, i look at all the people sitting there and thinking about the major cultural contradictions found in Turkey, specially in Izmir. Turkey has been always the link between many cultures, and has an extraordinary mix of people and their origins. It lies in the middle of European, Eastern, Russian and Arabian cultures, and hence, people. It is fighting to maintain a character in the mid of this mixture. So as i walk i find girls dressed in the European style, dying their hair blond and showing an intimate relation with their boyfriends. Next to them you will find an Eastern type veiled girl, with her husband and children. The 2 pictures seem very contradicting but the are found next to each other in Izmir.
---------------------
While getting on the boat i take a glimpse at the people getting on board with me. Some of them look like they are going home from work, others like they are just taking a public transportation to go to the other side of Izmir to do shopping or do some errands. Very few seem to ride the boat for fun as i do. They got used to using this boat as a transportation means that they seem to forget how enjoying it is. Then comes the waiter with the traditional Turkish tea. They call it Chay. I didn't like its taste for it's too bitter for me. It has the same Egyptian tea flavor but with this bitterness. I pass the tea invitation with a smile and say "Tesekkurler", meaning thanks a lot. After 20 minutes we reach "Karsheyaka", the neihbourhood on the opposite side of Izmir. The side i was staying in was "Alsancak", pronounced Alsanjack.
---------------------
Though all what was said to me about being careful and not stay late out of the hotel, i find the hotel area quite safe. Being the central place in Izmir for "trans-sexuals", they always tell me there is nothing i should fear :) and my colleagues (males) are the ones who should be worried :D i guess it's fair that men should experience being afraid on the street once ;)
Anyway, i used to take rounds, walking in the kordon and the narrow streets of Alsancak, and stay late without being worried. Anyway, the kordon restaurants, cafes and bars stay open till after midnight, during the whole week. I don't like staying alone in the hotel room so i usually exhaust myself walking before going to the hotel, so as to fall asleep once i arrive there.
---------------------
August - September 2006:
The Turkish cuisine:
The Turkish cuisine is very delicious, like Egyptian and Lebanese food. Turkish food is floating on olive oil (as all medierranean sea cities) and Yogurt!! yes, all dishes, all courses are served with yogurt. Dairy products in general are consumed heavily by Turkish people. And they should actually :) they have the best dairy products i have ever tasted... all kinds of cheese are delicious, specially goat cheese. Yogurt also is very tasty there, and also the most famous drink, Ayran, whic is more or less like el laban el rayeb in Egypt, a little salty. Very famous with Doner (el shawerma).. Oh i just loved everything there, the doner, kebab, pastry, cheese... everything!! I guess now there are no questions about why i gained weight this summer :D
---------------------
The sea:
I have a long time love story with the sea. In my life i saw lots of seas, lakes and rivers, in Egypt, USA and Turkey. But still the mediterranean sea is my love. So what else can i ask for other than having a sea view room on my beloved? The sea has always fascinated me, and gave me the feeling of mystery and adventure. Water, it's just water, but the power and danger that lies within is overwhelming. Some wind only can cause this power to emerge, and show its strength and what it can do when it goes mad. I loved the boat trips in the Egean sea (part of the medierranean) and enjoyed the water splashes on my face. Everytime the boat arrives to its destination, i wish i can stay more and not leave. I always wanted a job that has to do with the sea, and i actually applied for jobs in hotels and resorts in Hurghada & Sharm el Shiekh, but never did a single interview there :) So i was happy to stay in Izmir by the sea, and as i mentioned, it reminds me so much of Alexandria. I love Alexandria in Winter, so i am anxious to sea how does Izmir look in Winter. My next trip (4th trip - end of October) will be in Winter, let's wait and see.

to be continued..

آهه

قالولى افرحى
قلت لسه الفرحة مدخلتش قلبى
قالولى ليه بتفكرى
قلت معنديش اللى ياخد عقلى
قالولى الدمع كتر
قلت الدمع بيجيله يوم ويجف
والألم يخف
مفيش حاجة مبتعديش
والفرح أوالحزن دايماً يلف